Creatures of habit
Old habits die hard! Am I right or AM I RIGHT?
Seriously though? That’s a go to habit of mine, thinking I am right. Another one is spending quality time at Procrastination Station. A clear example of this, my blog. I told so many people I was going to write a weekly blog. Has that happened? Hells freakin no it hasn’t. I wrote 2 blogs and then vanished. Note to self: do not set unrealistic expectations.
What else? For the last few weeks I’ve been planning on updating my website. Haven’t done it. Why not? Because there were things to be cleaned in the apartment, pimples to be popped, food to be eaten, people to be creeped on social media, you catch my drift? THESE WERE (STILL ARE) IMPORTANT THINGS. However, I am over it. At the time, the ego voice in my head says things like “ah you’ll get to it later” or “look at that piece of chocolate” or “go creep them so you can compare yourself” but each and every time I fall for those tricks a little tiny bit of self-respect gets warn away along with a little of my self-trust.
The intentions are there, which is all well and good but if y’ain’t takin’ action ain’t nothin gonna happen. (I won’t change my habit of saying ain’t. It’s just too good and it serves me).
So here’s where I’m looking:
What’s the thing(s) you wanna do and why do you wanna do them? Does your why get you excited?
This is pretty key because if you’re just doing it or want to do it because you think you should then it may make it even more difficult for you to get that metaphorical ball rolling. Practice not shoulding yourself.
So that’s Step 1. Your what and what for.
Step 2. Take note of the things that you’re currently doing to sabotage you and what you’ve made that mean about you. ie. you’re a lazy piece of poo.
Step 3. Acknowledge that you thinking you’re a lazy piece of poo, or whatever your choice words are, is fine and normal because that’s what we humans do (MAKE SHIT UP), then actively choose not to listen to it. This step can feel SOOOOO hard because the story feels so real especially because you have the ‘evidence’ to prove it is true. You could likely argue all day long why it is true. And a 5 year old could totally argue all day long that SANTA is real (insert sad face) but he’s not (the only difference between these two examples, is that one of these beliefs is actually fun and enjoyable).
Step 4. Create an accountability structure and don’t set yourself up for failure with unrealistic expectations. An example might be starting a running routine of 3 days a week versus 7 days a week and having your BFF promise to upload a pic of you asleep and drooling if you miss your 3rd day (okay that might be a little harsh but our resistance is sometimes real tough and the threat of a viral drool pic me be the only way.)
Step 5. DO THE THING.
Step 6. Practice noticing when the voice of judgement is judging your effort or result and actively choose love and compassion.
Step 7. Be okay with feeling afraid. HUMANS GET SCARED. If we didn’t then spiders would have taken over the world by now, but like killing a spider just because it looks scary and evil, we don’t have to not do something just because we’re afraid of how it could go wrong, what people will think, that it won’t be good enough, etc, etc. Feel free to fill your etc in the blank __________ and then proceed anyway.
Step 8. Really notice how you feel when you build a habit of doing the thing. Hint: It feels pretty darn good.
Step 9. Practice not punishing yourself when you don’t do the thing cause that’s only going to add another chapter to your “Here we go again” novella.
To sum this up succinctly—our lives are basically created from habit; habitual actions, but more importantly habitual thoughts. Actions are driven by thought, right? So old habits dying a slow agonizing death? Nahhhh. Only if that voice in your head says they do. Turns out I am super wrong sometimes.